Hummingwolf at Home

I thought we were getting along well for a while there. Sure, there was that whole insomnia thing (and I apologize for my part in that, though you must admit we've been picking out some interesting library books lately); but that aside, our relationship seemed to be going fairly smoothly. There you were, doing your inscrutable stuff beneath the surface, while I was out here walking around and looking at the pretty clouds and trying to figure out what to do about Social Security and the like, not worrying about the deeper things which are your province. The superficial level was superficial, the deeper levels were deep, and the layers weren't mixing up horribly as they so often have in the past. Sure, I wondered sometimes what you were thinking while I was watching the football camp out on the field, but I figured you'd let me know if there was anything important to worry about.

See, I thought you were busy working on our life problems, that that's why you've been so quiet. So I felt it was best to let you do your work undisturbed, you know? I'd gather information that might be helpful to us and I'd absorb it so it'd be accessible to us both, and then you could do your thing and I could do mine and maybe we'd find a way to function together. But now you're sending me messages again and, frankly, I'm deeply disappointed in you. All you're doing is telling me the same things you've been saying all year! Come on, did you really think I didn't know what you think of this life we're leading? How useless, pathetic, and wasted it is? Puh-leeze. You've made your views abundantly clear, so don't you think it's time to move on? Maybe do something useful for a change? No, I don't mean that I don't deserve to live if I'm not busy doing something society considers "useful"; I mean that you, down there with access to all our deepest unconscious wisdom, should be helping us to find a way to live. This constant griping isn't getting either of us anywhere at all.

Listen, I'm sitting here eating a tasty, nutritious breakfast full of protein and vitamins and gods know what else, which should be adequate fuel for body and mind to do what they need to do. I'm going to pay what bills we have money for, make some phone calls (maybe get hold of a human being or two if we're lucky), read a bit and generally do my job on the outside. It's time for you to do your job too. If you're so unsatisfied with the life we're living, come up with a good way out that we can implement together.

And stop your miserable whining already. You're really annoying me.



Sincerely, Me.