hummingwolf: Snowflake-like kaleidoscope images (Kaleidocoolth)
hummingwolf ([personal profile] hummingwolf) wrote2007-12-17 03:27 pm

Wait, wait... There's *still* a "War on Christmas?"

Good grief, people, I thought this nonsense would be over by now. But [livejournal.com profile] hai_kah_uhk pointed out a lovely Language Log post on "Victims and etymology", which demonstrates that people are getting their War on Christmas and their War on Language confused, which makes me wonder how the War on Drugs can be made to fit into it all. But anyway, as some of you might recall, I received a relevant message from an important personage two Decembers ago. It all went something like this...



So everybody's talking about some War on Christmas these days. Today [livejournal.com profile] theferrett made this post which has generated approximately seven zillion comments so far as well as spawning posts in others' journals. Over in [livejournal.com profile] lyssabard's journal I commented:
My parents (both Christian and conservative) always taught me that it was polite to wish people "Happy Holidays!" this time of year if you had no idea what they celebrate. Sure, most people celebrate some form of Christmas, but it was (said Mom) polite not to make the assumption that everybody thinks like you. Also, if somebody wishes you a happy holiday-you-don't-celebrate, it is polite to thank them for their good wishes--after all, they are wishing you happiness.

Personally I think the silly "War on Christmas" should be re-termed the War on Politeness. But apparently that's just me.

After I'd typed that up, I got word from an elf. No, not one of the usual elves I like to hang out with, but one of the Big Guy's elves--a genuine Elf from Santa's Workshop up at the North Pole. I have an official message for all of you from Father Christmas, so youse guys had better listen up:

According to Mr. Claus himself, from this point onward, if any of you abuse the Christmas Spirit by mouthing off at some stranger who wished you a happy holiday or sent you greetings of the season, or if you complain about the fact that your local shopping mall has slightly fewer religious displays than your local house of worship, or if you whinge at a hapless salesclerk that their employer's advertising campaign somehow violates your religious liberties, or you yell at your neighbor for offering you the blessings of a holiday other than the specific one you prefer--You Will Pay. If you are lucky, dear St. Nick will simply slip into your house one night and bash your kneecaps. That's if you're lucky. You think Santa's just a jolly fat man who gives out presents? Oh ho ho no, you had better think again. Think back on your very worst family holidays and ponder this: That too was a reflection of the Holiday Spirit. Never doubt that Santa Claus has ways to make you cry.

Happy Holidays and pass the egg nog.
ext_3407: squiggly symbol floating over water (Cuddly plush toy)

[identity profile] hummingwolf.livejournal.com 2007-12-18 01:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Which media do you mean: the television with the constant Christmas episodes and Christmas specials, or the radio with all the ads telling you how many days are left for you to do your Christmas shopping? 'Cos I have yet to hear anybody telling me I can't say Merry Christmas, and I actually haven't been entirely media-free this year.