it smeared every saucer and a french maid yes, a sex aid and a nose, what do you mean?

As I have said many times before, I don't believe in astrology. I also know too much about astrology for someone who doesn't believe in it, but that's quite beside the point. Because of the way my morning's been going, I checked various personalized horoscope sites for the amusement value, and sure enough, they all say that today's one of those days when everything goes smoothly. Mercury doesn't go retrograde until tomorrow. If I believed in astrology at all, I would be absolutely certain that the planet of communication and niggling details was feeling stressed out today and taking out its frustrations on me.

Have I mentioned lately how much I hate voice mail systems? Particularly governmental voice mail systems? At least I finally managed to find some part of the system willing to let me record a message for the person who was trying to contact me early this morning.

(Subject line written by MegaHAL, in case you hadn't guessed.)