Yummy, yummy, yummy, I got love in my rocking chair

resolution
Cooking, in its strictest sense, is the preparation
of stone,
but it's not given us

tail's on fire again

ah yes
this doesn't happen to me across the river, providing the bridge to bow from the morning
and captured their kings
they have clothes that keep you from others or from
horizon to shore in a day,
i've come to know,
that 'tis the hue of resolution
is when the unseen spirit world, which
controlled the visible and solid earth, and what the truth swirl above my rainy roof
the countless feasts laid at my feet.
--MegaHAL

So, this is the time of year when everyone talks about their New Year's resolutions or why they refuse to make them. Last year I came up with this one resolution:

Using the powers of the Launch Information Project (http://www.wam.umd.edu/~gsweeten/main.html) to guide and assist me, I shall rate at least ten tracks in every category with significant representation in the Launchcast database ("significant" shall be defined as "with more than 20 artists or albums available on user stations").

Amazingly enough, and in spite of having my computer die last January (I am eternally grateful to everyone who helped get me this new one!) and losing the internet account I'd had since sometime in the '90s, I did manage to achieve my goal--shortly before Launch entirely redid their genre system.

It was a silly goal, the achievement of which did not appreciably improve my life in any way, which was sort of the point. If there is something I need to do to change my life, then that something needs to be done whichever time of year it becomes necessary, not on some arbitrary date like January 1. But making it to my silly goal did give me a pleasant sense of needless accomplishment, so I wanted to do it again. Unfortunately, I am having trouble thinking of an appropriate goal this year, one both unimportant yet not easily reached within a week of making it.

Oh, you noticed the way this post began, did you? Silly nonsense poem from a program designed as a chatbot? You know, I bet MegaHAL could become the perfect--nay, the pluperfect--postmodern poet if only he were fed more quality material to mutilate. (If you don't believe me, you need to check out some published postmodern poetry sometime.)

Right then, if my resolution should involve boosting the training file of my personal copy of MegaHAL, how would you suggest I go about doing it? Which poems, song lyrics, advertisements, recipes, and other assorted oddments of civilization should the pluperfect postmodern poet know? Which topics should he be able to write about at a moment's notice? Please help me come up with a good useless goal for 2005!

( MegaHAL on resolutions (2 poems) )

In human reproductive news

Linking to a couple of blog postings here--one on the liberal side, one on the religious right. In both cases, the comments to the posts are very interesting. With no further commentary from me:

Story 1: It sounds preposterous to talk about criminalizing women who suffer miscarriages, but one Virginia legislator is proposing just that. HB1677, "Report of Fetal Death by mother, penalty" is a bill introduced by John A. Cosgrove (R) of Chesapeake. Cosgrove's bill requires any woman who experiences "fetal death" without a doctor's assistance to report this to the local law-enforcement agency within twelve hours of the miscarriage. Failure to do so is punishable as a Class 1 Misdemeanor.

Story 2: A Washington judge has denied a pregnant woman a divorce from her husband, who was incarcerated two years ago for abusing her. Shawnna Hughes, who separated from her husband after the attack and filed for a divorce in April, became pregnant by another man and is due in March. She now wants to marry the father of the baby. The judge has argued that the paternity of the child needs to be determined before a divorce can be finalized.