(no subject)

Oh, this is worse than useless. I can't convince myself to do anything today, which means that not only am I self-annoyed (a normal enough occurrence), I am actively endangering my chances of survival. Or passively endangering my chances of survival, if you want to get technical about it.

Alternating between apathy and sheer, blind terror. Neither state is conducive to much of anything. This sucks. I have deadlines. It looks like they will not be met. What happens after that? Can I make myself care by then?

(no subject)

In its most basic form, optimism is the belief that the actions you take have effects on the world around you. This basic version of optimism is a prerequisite for directed action of any kind. We are born with it. But this optimism can be driven out in the laboratory through inducement of learned helplessness. Scientists can use electric shocks to teach lab rats that no matter what they do, they will be shocked. After a while, the rats get the message and cease to attempt to do anything at all.

Speaking of rats, one experiment late last year in a Japanese lab had infant rats decapitated and their heads transplanted onto adult rats' thighs. "A transplanted brain can develop as normal for at least three weeks, and the mouth of the head will move, as if it is trying to drink milk, the team reports." Nice picture, that, of the infant rat heads working and working for something they won't get.

I've been feeling awfully ratlike this week.

That said, I haven't completely learned the message of helplessness yet. I managed to make a phone call and get a deadline extended. Still don't know what I'm going to do, but have got a little more time in which to do it.