doing your worst

[hummingwolf]

"You've seen me at my worst now, so..." said the man to the woman. They walked off and I heard no more of the conversation, but I started thinking about the times someone has said to me that I've seen them at their worst. Is that statement ever true? I mean, is it true in the way the speaker intends it? It seems that most of the time, what people mean by their worst is how they behaved when they were drunk or sick or severely stressed out, when they were irrational for one reason or another. But aren't our worst behaviors the things we do when we think we're completely justified? Not the times when we tell ourselves later, "I don't know what came over me," but the times when we can state with perfectly clarity all our reasons for what we did? Sure, sometimes we realize later that what we thought perfectly rational behavior was really driven by greed or fear, but it may take us years to get over our self-righteousness and by then it may be too late.

Comments

[paradigm-palace.livejournal.com]

"But aren't our worst behaviors the things we do when we think we're completely justified?"

No, not necessarily. Sometimes we really *are* completely justified and rational when we think that we are. But I understand what you mean. And it can definitely go the way you are referring to. Here's a very loose personal example: At one point in time I felt completely justified in being a jerk to someone on livejournal who I didn't really know. I went hook, line and sinker for a trap set by an ex of mine and the result was that I got into a terribly ugly argument, online, with someone that the ex knew. I realize, now, the reasons I did it were not justification enough for what my behavior triggered. Granted, an ugly argument can't happen in a vacuum. The ugly went *both* ways, I assure you. And I'm sure that she (person I argued with) felt a similar justification for her actions at the time. But, honestly, it was all extremely unnecessary and if I knew then what I know now it would have never happened. Heck, if I knew then what I know now I would have never even dated the loser-prick who set things off to begin with. Having said all of that I will tell you that I never felt good about what went on when it was happening. I could have easily said back then that I was "at my worst". I never felt particularly "righteous" about it. I just felt extremely angry and like I was being attacked so I acted on my anger.

Shew. That was a novel :-)

[jennixen.livejournal.com]

What we decide ourselves is our worst might not be that for another person on the receiving end. :)

[sophy.livejournal.com]

I think that's it right there. I have an idea in my head of what I think my various "worst" states are, but it's possible the people who love me don't think those are the bad but have other times in mind when I was at my "worst" in their opinions.
Either way, I think it's always very nice when people can see us in our worst states and still love us. That's very powerful any way you look at it.

[aekiy.livejournal.com]

I can easily say that for these past two years, I've been at my worst..