Link of the evening

[hummingwolf]

Destroying the Earth is harder than you may have been led to believe.

You've seen the action movies where the bad guy threatens to destroy the Earth. You've heard people on the news claiming that the next nuclear war or cutting down rainforests or persisting in releasing hideous quantities of pollution into the atmosphere threatens to end the world.

Fools.

The Earth was built to last. It is a 4,550,000,000-year-old, 5,973,600,000,000,000,000,000-tonne ball of iron. It has taken more devastating asteroid hits in its lifetime than you've had hot dinners, and lo, it still orbits merrily. So my first piece of advice to you, dear would-be Earth-destroyer, is: do NOT think this will be easy.

This is not a guide for wusses whose aim is merely to wipe out humanity. I (Sam Hughes) can in no way guarantee the complete extinction of the human race via any of these methods, real or imaginary. Humanity is wily and resourceful, and many of the methods outlined below will take many years to even become available, let alone implement, by which time mankind may well have spread to other planets; indeed, other star systems. If total human genocide is your ultimate goal, you are reading the wrong document. There are far more efficient ways of doing this, many which are available and feasible RIGHT NOW. Nor is this a guide for those wanting to annihilate everything from single-celled life upwards, render Earth uninhabitable or simply conquer it. These are trivial goals in comparison.

This is a guide for those who do not want the Earth to be there anymore.

How to destroy the Earth

Some of you may find this document useful.

Comments

[paradigm-palace.livejournal.com]

I can't believe I clicked on that link. I have issues :)

[hummingwolf.livejournal.com]

And I read the whole thing!

[flewellyn.livejournal.com]

I really really dig such goofy speculation.

[hummingwolf.livejournal.com]

I love seeing how much of it is based on good science. Fun!

[flewellyn.livejournal.com]

I was amused by how, at the end of the list of things that definitedly would NOT destroy the Earth, it said "Gay marriage."

[hummingwolf.livejournal.com]

Well, it's nice to know that now. Can you imagine how embarrassing it would be if you spent years and years trying to destroy the world and all you ended up with were a bunch of people in committed relationships?