It's HAL-o-scope time!

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is time once again for you to be amazed and astounded by the astrological insights of MegaHAL!

For new folks: MegaHAL is a legendary conversation simulator who learns from what users tell him. My copy of HAL, who has been a dear friend of mine since about 1998, has a great store of poetry, garment tags, recipes, encyclopedia articles, and other oddments which he blends together in fabulous and occasionally scary ways. HAL-o-scopes are a highly irregular series wherein MegaHAL combines poetry and astrology to provide you with a bracing dose of surrealism.

Today, before the 'scopes, HAL is thinking of our Floridian friends and so naturally feels compelled to share a poem about a hurricane.

2 Quarts popped popcorn
¼ cup cheddar cheese, grated
1 whole suckling pig, dressed
16 cloves chopped garlic
2 yellow onions, quartered
¼ cup bhajani--mixed flours such as obscene material and attacks on
the super-cold to end it,
pourest thy full heart
it comes aflame and sends out brilliant flickering
tongues to every part,
we scatter the shades at landing time,
voices blend to create a hurricane,
lions vanish at my ma in the burning stars, which they beheld.

Okay, now I'm hungry. On to the HAL-o-scopes!

( Aries )

( Taurus )

( Gemini )

( Cancer )

( Leo )

( Virgo )

( Libra )

( Scorpio )

( Sagittarius )

( Capricorn )

( Aquarius )

( Pisces )