hummingwolf | How sad.

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perspective

How sad.

Here I am, 33 years old, (originally typed "30" there 'cos my brain is fried,) disabled and never had a job, trying to get benefits and can't even get the folks doing the disability determination to return my calls, too poor and exhausted to go out and do anything interesting, haven't had a "significant other" in, well, ever...

And I love life. I think life is a magical, wonderful thing and the world is a wonderful, magical place and I can't wait to see what happens next.

I'm hopeless. I'm gonna die an optimist, I just know it.

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I have been wondering, were you born naturally optimistic or have you had to work at it?

True story: When my 12th grade English teacher was choosing students to read the various parts of a play in class, she described one part as being that of a cynical, pessimistic character who could always be counted on to see the dark side of life... and as she described him, she looked at me and I could practically see the light bulb go on over her head just before she asked, "Could you read this part?!"

So I don't seem to come by it naturally.

But then I can't think of any way I'd have learned it in these last few years either--life events don't seem to be conspiring to teach me optimism when I look at them objectively.

I think this optimism is a virus I must have picked up somewhere.

So I don't seem to come by it naturally.

I thought that was probably the case... That's probably the case for most people. A bright outlook is something that must be cultivated.

life events don't seem to be conspiring to teach me optimism when I look at them objectively.

:/

In my own case I feel like life events backed me into a corner so I had no other choice but to try to adjust my attitude :P

I don't think that's sad at all.

I think that's awesome. :)

Yeah, I think optimism tends to make it possible for me to lead a better life than I would otherwise, that my optimistic outlook is drawing me on to brighter tomorrows... but then I would think that, wouldn't I?

LOL. Cute. :)

i can't wait to see what happens next either, and i'm hoping for nothing but good things for you. (do you have heat yet?)

No heating oil yet, but one of the housemates just loaned me her space heater for the night, so I won't freeze to death after all! Yay!

Your hopes for me are much appreciated, Ms. Vicki. :-)

tree... sunset... did you make that icon especially for hummingwolf? :D

i wish i could say i did, but i CAN say that i took the photo myself about a year ago, turned it into an icon, and especially chose to use it for that post. it's much prettier in a big version.

the photo

There are worse things to die from than optimism, I'm sure. :)

I dunno, I think optimism might be like a cancer--it keeps growing, feeding on things that should be food for more realistic attitudes as if it's hijacked my brain's circuits in order to divert them to ridiculous thoughts of a bright future. It's rather disconcerting to think about, really.

*grin*

yup.
you ARE hopeless. --
b/c you don't rely on hope to make you happy.

you CHOOSE to be happy.

well, that non-state-of-being-which-is-too-difficult-to-name-without-using-already-abused-words-like-zen-and-tao-so-we-call-it-happy.

yea, THAT happy.
;)

it's a wonderful place to be aint it??!

*smiles and rainbows*
*hug*
:) :)

Whatever state this is, I would not describe it as happy. "Hopeful" is actually closer--not a hope that things will turn out a certain way (things never turn out as expected in my life), but simply the hope that the world will continue to contain all the little beauties I notice any time I truly pay attention.

yes!!! optimism is a CHOICE!!! years ago, i found myself in a pit (or a corner ;) ) and i had to decide whether to die or to live. "but", i despaired, "i don't know HOW to live!"... but i chose to live.

our outlook is how we CHOOSE to live.

it is independent of external events. hopefully. ;)

instead of defining ourselves on how we react to external events, we define ourselves almost despite them. ;)

if we allow ourselves to say "i WANT to be happy." it makes a world of difference in our outlook. it allows us to appreciate the daily beauties we encounter, despite difficult circumstances in our life functionings.

i think it is difficult and courageous to take responsibility for one's happiness. this is what optimism is, to me. expecting positive circumstances to come to me, instead of negative ones. i deserve to be happy. we all do. but we aren't raised in this culture to think that way. but i think that is a realistic expectation. that i can create my world in this world to be one that allows me to live in harmony, and living in harmony allows me to be happy, and offers me many opportunities for interacting w/the world in a beautific and joyous manner.

i wish you would consider the possibility that your optimism is a gift, and a courageous outlook (not that any of us are surprised at yet another aspect of your courage ;) ). you deserve to be happy and you choose to find happiness to the fullest extent of your range. your range is limited by external factors (your health, money), but your life is very full b/c you CHOOSE to fill it!! so maybe you are not happy. but it seems your life is full of happiness. maybe? :)

oh, one last thing, in case you are thinking i can afford this view now that i have a job, well actually, i decided the job wasn't worth sacrificing what is important to me, so i am back to temping. ;)

(oops, too long, split to part 2 ;) )

well, this whole tirade was basically b/c i don't understand why being optimistic has such a bad rap. i get it all the time. i get told that i'm naive and too trusting. what is wrong with looking for the good in the world and in people? what is wrong w/setting an expectation that the world will show me its good side? do i "set myself up" for disappoinment? sure, sometimes. but i'd rather be disappointed by a negative than be validated by one. i refuse to perpetuate a realistic view with an eye on the ground. i choose to look at the sky and expect the world to expand and grow to its potential. if we all chose to accept that the realistic view is that the way the world is, is the way it will always be, we'd prolly all still be living in caves. thinking about this now, i truly think that as one person choosing an optimistic view, of believing that we should be able to expect people to act in more positive and more selfless ways, that i contribute to the manifestation of that 'improved' reality. i'm willing to accept the disappointment brought by current limitations of capacities of a person or system with the knowledge that deeper capabilities DO exist in the same system. and that simply by expressing that belief, i help fuel the seed of growth. i think if enough people fuel the seed, the critical mass required for growth is reached.

"critical mass" is a concept used in chemistry. it is the point at which a system gains enough energy to overcome the "activation point" (like how much coffee does it take for you to get going in the morning ;) ). when that point is reached, a reaction is started.

ooh i found a nice definition of critical mass which is a nice analogy to human potential: "Critical mass = the mass of fissionable material required to produce a self-sustaining chain reaction".

(where "fissionable material" is fuel. it is the energy released by the exothermic reaction of splitting a nucleus - a small, very dense center of positive charge - using a single neutron. )

a "critical reaction" is then defined as: "Critical reaction (nuclear) = a reaction in which exactly one neutron from each fission event causes another fission event, thus sustaining the chain reaction."

so if we apply this to a system of people (instead of a system of chemical solution), we can realitically believe that our singular positive actions CAN positively affect the world!!

nifty huh? i love science. it is so often an amazing analogy for the human system/community!

is optimism rarer than pessimism? hm. all i can speak for is the small community i see in my daily life. actually, i am finding the more optimistic i am and the more i expect good events in my life, the more i encounter similarly-minded people!!

well, i was going w/that question (optimism rarer than pessimism) towards the power of a minority vision, that optimism is simply viewing reality another way, and that choosing such an outlook can actually shift the balance of events in reality more towards positive outlook. and wow! i think i am actually experiencing that!! huh.

nifty.
*grin*

hugs,
pollyanna pixie ;)
aka positron pixinator
aka pixie peacemaker
aka powerpuff pixie...
aka P.O.W. (pushing optimism worldwide)
yay! let's hear it for the pixie P.O.W.er!!!!

*hee* i luuuuv alliteration!! *grin*

i think people say you're "too naive" and "too trusting" out of fear. They have not yet learned to make themselves vulnerable and open, so they react fearfully when they see you do it. Don't worry. They are just living differently from you.

Oh yeah, that whole critical mass thing reminds me of M-field theory. That's the phenomenon where those monkeys on a remote island learned to wash their potatoes in the water, and when a certain amount of them learned it (read: "critical mass"), then people on the mainland started observing the same species of monkey doing the same behavior!

There is nothing wrong with approaching the world with the assumption that all will be well. Trust is strong and beautiful. Preach it, sisters!!

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How sad.

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response part 1 ;)

response part 2 ;)

Re: response part 2 ;)