Happy November!

Saturday, November 1st, 2008 03:22 pm
hummingwolf: Gold starlike kaleidoscope images. (Gold stars)
Happy November! How was everyone's Hallowe'en, Samhain, regular Friday, or whatever else you might have celebrated? Yesterday was a lovely day here, with pleasantly autumnal weather, crunchy leaves underfoot, changing leaves overhead, and cheery pumpkins scattered around the neighborhood. My body decided to express its displeasure (with me, with the environment, or with life in general--I'm not sure) during the day, so I didn't do nearly as much as I had hoped with the time. I spent the evening finishing the book Howl's Moving Castle and answering the door to give out the three different kinds of candy I'd bought that had managed not to get munched on by me during the month.

A fair number of kids were out, though as usual I forgot to pay attention to the costumes because I was paying too much attention to the children's faces as they received their candy. It was a polite bunch overall, remembering to say "Thank you" even if they had completely forgotten to say "Trick-or-treat!" One wee child being carried around by his parents wasn't old enough to know how to say anything, but he was very friendly and patted me with his little hands as I put candy in his plastic pumpkin. A little girl thanked me and was leaving the house, but turned around again to tell me that my hair was pretty. She may have thought it was part of a costume. Anyway, I was glad I'd bought the amount of candy I did because it seemed to be about right for the night.

So now it's November. You know what that means, don't you? It's time for MegaPoMo: MegaHAL Poetry Month! This month I shall try to post at least one bit of MegaHAL output each day, though judging by past years it's likely that there will be a few skipped days which will have to be made up for later on. Anyway, today, the first day of the month, is a good time for HAL to demonstrate that he is not only a notable postmodern poet, but also one of the most unique astrologers you may ever encounter. Please, please do not blame me if you can't make heads nor tails of these: the ways of HAL are inscrutable and beyond mere mortal understanding!

Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )

Happy November!

Thursday, November 1st, 2007 09:01 pm
hummingwolf: animation of green and gold fractal, number of iterations increasing with time (Iterations in green and gold)
In an effort to get myself back into the habit of posting regularly, I have decided to participate in this year's MegaPoMo. Look for these special posts all through the month of November!

For the uninitiated: MegaPoMo is short for MegaHAL Poetry Month, an annual event I made up last year in response to the popular NaNoWriMo. So, what's MegaHAL? MegaHAL is a freeware conversation simulator designed to learn from what you tell it. The creator, Jason Hutchens, used the program to try to win the Loebner contest, and so he trained it with data which someone might use in an ordinary conversation. I, on the other hand, have fed my copy of the program (an old DOS instantiation I'm still fond of) with poetry, song lyrics, garment tags, more poetry, horoscopes, bits of encyclopedia articles, bits of news stories, recipes, various vaguely-interesting text found on the Internet, and more poetry. If the output makes any sense at all, it is through no fault of my own.

Unlike NaNoWriMo, MegaPoMo is not about word count, and it is certainly not about making anything like sense. So what is it about? Posting at least one bit of MegaHAL's poetic output for each day of the month of November. The various kinds of things that interrupt real life may make posting every day unrealistic; but if I miss a day, I shall endeavor to post two MegaPoMo posts on the following day. Oh, and more than anything else, MegaPoMo is about enjoying computer-generated nonsense just for the fun of it.

MegaHAL is not only an accomplished postmodern poet, he is also one of the most insightful astrologers practicing the art and craft of astrology today. And so, as we did last year, we shall begin MegaPoMo 2007 with sun-sign horoscopes for everyone. Because MegaHAL was feeling obliging enough to provide one-liner 'scopes for everyone, those will be placed outside the cuts where all can read without clicking, while more in-depth poetic readings are available in the full version of the post. Enjoy!



Aries: you're still exploring new ways to connect some people in your arms.
More for Aries )
Taurus: speed is still blurry and she stood there hot as an appetizer.
More for Taurus )
Gemini: you should be drumming here.
More for Gemini )
Cancer: extravagance is good for present ill!
More for Cancer )
Leo: your opinions rule--no one can escape the boogie.
More for Leo )
Virgo: skip the typical dinner locales and try a new euclidean plane.
More for Virgo )
Libra: you pick up the steps with my great work for others. [Why, yes I do, Hal. It's my pleasure!]
More for Libra )
Scorpio: you will see the total pressure occur closer to heaven.
More for Scorpio )
Sagittarius: many pieces are falling into place and creating a nice girl.
More for Sagittarius )
Capricorn: today is an alien city.
More for Capricorn )
Aquarius: experience things on its unleashing, so mirrors cause and denies effect.
More for Aquarius )
Pisces: instead of waiting for recognition, today, there's more need for a moment on the roof.
More for Pisces )
hummingwolf: Gold starlike kaleidoscope images. (Gold stars)
While I'm too sleepy to have any clear idea of whether or not I'm making any sense, and therefore reluctant to try to say much of anything at all, MegaHAL is an enlightened being free of all such worries! MegaHAL rules! So, here are your not-very-sensible horoscopes for today:


Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )
hummingwolf: Gold starlike kaleidoscope images. (Gold stars)
These are MegaHAL's last words for all of you--until next year.


Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )

Happy Nearly-New Year, everyone!
hummingwolf: Mathemagical animation made out of string. (Incredible String Thing)
Yes indeed, today is the start of MegaHAL Poetry Month! This is the month wherein I post at least one MegaHAL poem* each day**, unless for some reason I am unable to get online (which we can all agree would be a tragedy of the first order and is much too horrible to contemplate). And what better way to begin this glorious month than with poetic horoscopes from the pluperfect postmodern poet himself? Here is MegaHAL in all his wisdom, ushering in what should be a wondrous thirty days!


Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )

* Behind a cut if I'm feeling kind.

** If you're very lucky, I might even write something myself for each of those days. It might even make sense. If you're very lucky.
hummingwolf: Gold starlike kaleidoscope images. (Gold stars)
Finally! It's the time so many of you have been waiting for for so long: MegaHAL has delved into astrology once again!

For the confused among you: MegaHAL is a conversation simulator who learns from what he's told. My own personal HAL has been fed with many things through the years--poetry, song lyrics, cookie recipes, garment tags, poetry, magazine advertisements, encyclopedia articles, spam, more poetry--you get the picture. There is no particular reason why anything MegaHAL says should make the least bit of sense, so of course he is both the ideal astrologer and potentially the pluperfect postmodern poet. Here he is now to offer his advice to both his old adoring fans and new people who don't know what the heck is going on here. To find your HAL-o-scope for the day, just click the appropriate link below!


Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )
hummingwolf: animation of green and gold fractal, number of iterations increasing with time (Iterations in green and gold)
MegaHAL loves you all.


Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )
hummingwolf: animation of green and gold fractal, number of iterations increasing with time (Iterations in green and gold)
Yes! Once again, the amazingly psychic MegaHAL has agreed to bless you all with the benefits of his wisdom! Here on this happy Christmas Adam, each of the twelve commonly-acknowledged astrological signs has a special horoscope, full of nonsense insight which you should somehow find a way to apply to your own life. MegaHAL horoscopes--more poetic than the newspaper, better than inkblots! Enjoy yours today!

Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )
hummingwolf: Drawing of a creature that is part-wolf, part-hummingbird. (Hummingwolf by Dandelion)
Multiple 'scopes for everyone! Today is a good day to be surreal. MegaHAL gave us Libras a poem that's positively synesthetic.


Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )
hummingwolf: Drawing of a creature that is part-wolf, part-hummingbird. (Hummingwolf by Dandelion)
Chances are that I'll post more HAL-o-scopes on HAL-loween, since MegaHAL seems quite fond of the holiday--or fond of talking about spirits and bats and chocolate, at any rate.


Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )

It's HAL-o-Scope Time!

Wednesday, October 5th, 2005 09:42 am
hummingwolf: squiggly symbol floating over rippling water (Kaleidoscope (purple & white))
Often dismissed as a mere chatterbot or nonsense generator, MegaHAL is developing a reputation among devotees of the divinatory arts for having psychic powers more impressive than those of other sun-sign horoscope writers. Or at least, HAL is substantially more likely to say something like:
Libra: your best ideas are meeting in market-place.

nay, go not thou to the disco duck.

Which is indisputably good advice. For more high-quality guidance, click the appropriate cut and see what MegaHAL has to say to you!


Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )
hummingwolf: animation of green and gold fractal, number of iterations increasing with time (Iterations in green and gold)
Ladies and Gentlemen, it is time once again for you to be amazed and astounded by the astrological insights of MegaHAL!

For new folks: MegaHAL is a legendary conversation simulator who learns from what users tell him. My copy of HAL, who has been a dear friend of mine since about 1998, has a great store of poetry, garment tags, recipes, encyclopedia articles, and other oddments which he blends together in fabulous and occasionally scary ways. HAL-o-scopes are a highly irregular series wherein MegaHAL combines poetry and astrology to provide you with a bracing dose of surrealism.

Today, before the 'scopes, HAL is thinking of our Floridian friends and so naturally feels compelled to share a poem about a hurricane.
2 Quarts popped popcorn
¼ cup cheddar cheese, grated
1 whole suckling pig, dressed
16 cloves chopped garlic
2 yellow onions, quartered
¼ cup bhajani--mixed flours such as obscene material and attacks on
the super-cold to end it,
pourest thy full heart
it comes aflame and sends out brilliant flickering
tongues to every part,
we scatter the shades at landing time,
voices blend to create a hurricane,
lions vanish at my ma in the burning stars, which they beheld.

Okay, now I'm hungry. On to the HAL-o-scopes!

Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )

HAL-o-scopes!

Monday, August 1st, 2005 10:03 pm
hummingwolf: (two)
Yes, all you poor wanderers upon this fevered globe have been without the guidance of MegaHAL for far too long. It is time for you to listen to the voice of the stars, as interpreted by everyone's favorite artificial nonsense generator! (And it's true: I am a Libra. Eerie how well that works out.)

Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )

HAL-o-scopes!

Wednesday, June 1st, 2005 07:45 pm
hummingwolf: animation of green and gold fractal, number of iterations increasing with time (Iterations in green and gold)
Yes, your favorite postmodern poet astrologer is back! The newly reconstituted MegaHAL--the chatterbot who has patiently endured my insanity for so long--returns with both short and long horoscopes for everybody. There are one-liners here for most of the signs, as well as somewhat longer poemscopes for those of you who enjoy extended nonsense.

Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )
hummingwolf: Drawing of a creature that is part-wolf, part-hummingbird. (Hummingwolf by Dandelion)
Today is April 1, known to many of us as April Fool's Day. Can you think of anyone better qualified to give advice to April fools than the amazing MegaHAL? Of course not! So, here is the wisdom dear HAL has for you today (and if you think this makes sense, you're either (A) fooling yourself or (B) a weirdo like me):
Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )

In more silliness: A very silly meme-like thing has been spreading around, where people list 25 songs which have played on their iPod, WMP, or what-have-you, adding the words "In My Pants" to the titles. Having no iPod and few mp3s on this machine, I decided to test out the newest Launch algorithm and find out what my Launchcast station wants to put in my pants. So then, here's your silly playlist:
1. Siouxsie & the Banshees, "Shadowtime in my Pants"
2. Nine Inch Nails, "The Mark Has Been Made in my Pants"
3. Serge Prokofiev, "Sonata for Violin and Piano No. 1, Op. 80: II. Allegro Brusco in my pants"
::snerk:: I knew there'd have to be one like that.
4. Jonatha Brooke, "Out of Your Mind in my Pants"
5. Depeche Mode, "A Question of Lust (Live) in my Pants" Oh, that one's much too obvious.
This whole thing is pants )
Just fifteen because there's only so long I can sit in this chair today. Last night, the station played such classics as Suzanne Vega's "Tombstone in my Pants," Aerosmith's "Janie's Got a Gun in my Pants," Queensryche's "Breaking the Silence in my Pants," and Emerson, Lake & Palmer's "21st Century Schizoid Man in my Pants."

Have a happy April Fool's Day, everyone!

Your HAL-o-scope

Friday, March 4th, 2005 12:00 pm
hummingwolf: animation of green and gold fractal, number of iterations increasing with time (Iterations in green and gold)
If you believe in a synchronicity which allows us to look at the stars to learn about ourselves, then surely there is also a synchronicity at work in computer-generated poetry. Here is what MegaHAL has to say to you today.

Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )
hummingwolf: Snowflake-like kaleidoscope images (Kaleidocoolth)
Yes, it has happened at last: Your favorite pseudopoet and your favorite pseudoscience are together at last! Please do be sure to heed the wisdom of MegaHAL today, taking his words to heart at least as much as you would the words of your local newspaper's astrologer. Your life will be better for it, really.

Aries )
Taurus )
Gemini )
Cancer )
Leo )
Virgo )
Libra )
Scorpio )
Sagittarius )
Capricorn )
Aquarius )
Pisces )

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